As I look back on the last few years, it’s been pretty incredible the amount of growing that God has done in my heart and in my knowledge of Him and His Word.
For so many years I depended on a church, a leader, a staff, a pastor to form my beliefs. If you asked me, I would certainly call them “my beliefs”, but where did they come from? Not directly from the Bible, because I wasn’t digging into it myself. Sure I read it here and there, but I left it to my pastor and my spiritual leaders to interpret what the Bible says. Their interpretations were above mine because they have “authority”. Because they have degrees or theology knowledge.
When Max and I decided not to go back “to church” as the building, we quickly realized how much noise was present in our lives. The noise of programs, services, voices, etc. It was quite shocking how quiet that it became. Though it was a bit scary at first, we soon realized that this moment was for a purpose. It was to drown out the noise and listen for the Holy Spirit’s guidance in our lives. After all, he had led us to this moment.
Some like to use the word desconstruction, but I am not a fan of that word. That implies that you completely disassemble something. You take it all apart. This is not what we did. We trusted the Lord to help us hold onto what is true and never let go. I don’t like to give things a title, but what we went through was more of a quieting.
A quieting of the traditions of man. Quieting those beliefs that we had taken on from others. At the same time, allowing the Holy Spirit and the Bible to speak loud and clear to us about what was really true.
We had to start over with our faith at ground zero.